Our Days

Having been here for 6 weeks now, Brad and I have developed a new sense of normal. Which, for all our friends and families isn't normal at all, but for us and the families surrounding us here at CHOC and The Ronald McDonald House it's all we now know.

We start our morning at Mc D's House, second floor room 5. Down to the kitchen for some coffee and a bite before were out the door to CHOC to see our little man. As we pass the hutch that is on our way out, our hearts break for the white rose that is sometimes there to recognize a family who has just lost their child. Sometimes we get caught up in our own misfortunes that we forget, we're all on the same boat, each family here is traveling a journey all their own, none more significant than the other.

Once were out the door and in the car, a quick 5 minute drive to CHOC (I am so thankful we are able to stay at Ronald McDonald house be this close to our son). Parked and on the shuttle, Brad and I start getting excited and nervous to see Dougie. Hop off the shuttle, and head for the front desk to check in. Most days the recpetionist greets us by name and gives us our badges before we have to ask. Up the elevators to the second floor, we arrive at room #202. You'd spot Dougies room from a mile away, he has planes, trains, and automobiles all clinged on his door.
Now our hearts start to race as we enter into our babies room, because we never know what we will find when walking into that room. A room packed with ventilators, oxygen tanks, monitors, tubes, meds and the most important thing in the room, our baby. Some days we find him bright eyed and bushy tailed, just wiggling around soaking up the sun while his nurse does her cares. Other days, the bad days, we walk in to find him crying with foam like cecretions so bad his lips have stuck together, eyes so swollen he cant even open them, and depending on his nurse that day, no one in sight.

But because of the rose we saw on our way out the door, and all the sick children we've seen while making our way to room 202, we are reminded of how truly blessed we are. Things could always be worse. But mainly we are reminded that, along with all the other families here, we are in all pain and we are all suffering and hurting for our children, because when your children hurt, you hurt.

The days slowly creep by here at CHOC... each day previous feels like a week ago. But we manage to pass the time taking pics of our little man, doing his daily massages, baby arobics listening to music to calm the Dougster, Hank Williams jr., and Dwight Yokam seem to do the trick every time. These past couple of weeks it has been pretty entertaining watching Brad play Aunt Terry and PaPa Tony in Scrabble on his phone. The comedy that comes from the melt downs or gloating after a win or a loss is priceless, so thank you both for keeping us entertained.

We've become very close to Dougies associate nurses, Charlene, Kristen, Mandy and Jamie. It is amazing the comfort I feel when they are taking care of our little man. Its never easy to leave our son, but when he is in their care we feel assured that he is in the best hands. Its so wonderful to see the love and compassion they have for Doug. Its the little things like when they take hold of his hand to comfort him when he is upset that fill my heart with joy. We are so incredibly thankful for them!

I wasnt having the best day yesterday. Doug has continued to put on weight, he is still swollen and there are still no answers as to why. Everyone tells us this is a long process, we'll be here for a while; and I am prepared for that, I have prepared for and accepted our long journey of peeks and valleys. Its the unknown that drives me nuts... its been a few weeks since this swelling started, granted some days its better, and somedays its worse. But still, almost a month has passed and we dont know why he hasnt lost this fluid. So I've been a little frustrated. Then Grampa Glenn and Grammy Steph came to visit (Steph got to change Dougies diaper!), then we went to dinner... I wasnt talking much, my patience was shot and I just wanted the day/weekend to be over so we can have our favorite nurses back. Once we got to dinner our waitress noticed the CHOC badge on Glenn, she asked if we were at a confrence there and Brad told her our baby boy is there. Then she looked at me and asked if I was Mere, I said yes and she said "I know your baby! I've heard his story and me and my family pray for him everyday, he will be fine I just know it" as she took my hand and reached across the table to give me a hug I just about lost it. Turns out she is the Aunt of my Brother in-law Ben and heard about Dougie through Ben's mom. I knew it was a sign from God, I was struggling and he sent her to assure me he hears our prayers (he should, he is getting a ton) and although nothing is changing at this moment I know he is working on it!

In the mean time, God Bless our Little Man, and God Bless everyone of you who is following Dougies Journey and praying that he get well soon. Words can not express how greatful we are for your prayers and support.

Love to all,

Mere and Brad